All three of us are crippled to think on our own and in deep resentment and depression. Your official late-to-the-game guide to K-Pop, Taylor Swift made an appearance at The 1975's concert that has us quaking, TikTok fashion trends you should look out for this winter, 4 things your period *definitely* won't stop you from doing, 4 ways to feel better when you have a cold, Your guide to creating the ultimate long-distance relationship playlist, How to tell if you're crushing on your girl BFF, The perfect to-go cups to keep your drink warm, WIN! My heart rips itself apart going through the thought. My Mother is most of these, my mother scares, lowers self esteem, makes me feel under aprisiated, and gets angry at me for little things. Not to even mention my life outside work. (She's 92 and can't live for much longer). 9 years they have been grumbling and criticizing my choice of freelance self-employment only because I dashed their dreams of being gainfully employed in the system. The other day she told me she she'd never forgiven me for accepting a biscuit from a neighbour when I was just 3. POSTED IN School, grades, problems with my parents, my parents are way-strict. Really I'd put my soul in it. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 20, 2018: Are you the oldest of a large/very large family? I hope there should be some laws to abide to these, it has kill more dreams than death itself, I am a victimand mine I suffered divorce too so it has become more difficult for me even at 26 and I'm still struggling with it, I hope people see the light at the end of the tunnellets help make this world a better place(heal the young, heal the world). But this psychologist stayed long enough for me to explain what I felt was important. Second therapist is known locally for being pretty good. But for this a guiding hand makes a huge impact. Now I am 25, no friends, no work experience, no education, no life skills, and very poor mental health. Many parents staunchly believe in blind and mindless conformity. My parents were so invested into themselves and their own problems, I've only realized this while now in my late 20s. really, a lot of things are wrong with me because of my parents. I then became a parent while my mom went out partying and drinking. But when I was on the baseball team my dad was manager my mom team mom. 1 Answer: Your father is an abusive parent. My parents & brothers even told me I deserved to be raped & that me getting raped was 'my fault'. Being an overbearing parent leads to pushback from the child and is not worth it in the long run. That was embarrassing to me as what could I have done ?! Really thankful for it, I've been trying to be super human. my parents always tell me how am disappointing and how I will fail my tests. I already knew about my low self-esteem because of my family. Correction and discipline are not meant to demoralize children and to make them feel less than what they are. Preach a positive mental approach to dealing with failures and mistakes. Once she told me you will never be a boy so stop pretending to be one. What NOT to do if you are the parent of a college student. I have some gear so ill start practicing without rest. I dont get complimented on my looks as much in my family or life as my sister and everyone else in my family does. i even developed anger issues and the second eldest also did too. If you want to get notified by every reply to your post, please register. I wasn't able to have a childhood after, I believe i had a third sibling? However, this has the opposite effect and gives the child a permanently poor body and self-image. But I've started going to the gym and learning about how to look after your body with real foods. But an under-achiever. Your father is abusive & his behavior is inexcusable. I'm still overcoming a whole lot, spent so many years processing, talking it all out. They are grossly unhappy, yearning for what might have been. It is best for you to disassociate from him & his family. They feel that if their children are just like them, everything will be harmonious and stress-free. It started with the lion share of chores. Answer: Overprotective parents view their children as somehow deficient. If that doesn't pan out, seek a counselor's help. Truth be told, I'm moderately smart but exceptionally creative and talented. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on April 15, 2018: Seek counselling either by talking to a close friend, relative, or a psychologist. They should be encouraged. To order Carol's newest book,Speed of Life, clickhere. Strict parents, They are trying to shape me into what they want me to be, How to deal with teenagers?! Putting money into savings for acting school or classes. Question: Why does my father point out all my flaws? This man & his family are toxic. They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. I'll be joining Jujitsu next once I take my health back. Instead, parents should encourage their children to develop a sense of independence and respect their authority at the same time. Parents often believe that if they extol the positive characteristics of siblings and other children to their so-called errant child, their own child will improve. Her parents were lazy, uneducated, and short-sighted. Often, the comparison does the opposite. They care about your grades because they want a good future for you. Also, disassociate from your family. Ever since i was a child i had developed depression because i was always in such a negative space. How To Deal With Teenagers: How Bad Is Peer Pressure, And Can Parents Influence The Peer Group? I just want to let you know "anonymous" and "no account please" I think you are both really special and strong! , my mum used to and still criticises her weight even though she looked fine, I dont know if that caused me to be extremely uncomfortable with gaining any weight. I've tried reaching out to people for help. Question: Why do I feel so guilty when my father points out my siblings flaws? So if a young one dares to have a unique, creative, and innovative thought or idea, it is squashed and often labeled as outlandish and weird because nobody else thought of it! Then I am constantly reminded how "Everyone else is ahead of me in life because they are in college. However, they are doing irreparable damage and making their kids quite dependent and indecisive regarding the simplest life choices. I sat in my room crying until i eventually ran out of tears or dad came back from home and hugged me. Please see a counsellor & DISASSOCIATE yourself from your "family." its just too much, i cant go on living like this and i get frequent suicidal thoughts. Click HERE to win them all! This has ruined a career, now I have to retrain for something else. These parents contend that they own their offspring. they make me work for all the free time that i have then get mad when i stay up at night because it's the only time i have to actually relax. Question: I think my parents wanted a perfect child instead they got me. Trying to navigate through one's own life and become independent and happy while one's parents harass you with their expectations, agendas and emotional manipulation - to fulfill their own paternal and maternal desires and dreams - should be a focus for the World Health Organisation. "He just kept saying over and over: 'In our family, that's not acceptable.' I didn't know what to say to him. Question: If you know that your father was from a family of people who homicidally hounded family members to suicide by crushing their self-esteem, is it normal to continue hating such a person until old age? All throughout my childhood i knew i had an abusive mother because one of my teachers in elementary opened my eyes. Meantime, I performed exceptionally at primary school, but my mother said it was only because I had dumb kids in my year. People help themselves. Please get help. My mom didn't even practice with me. No more getting grounded or bitched at etc. Siblings treat me the same. I want the ability to defend myself from perverts. 1 Evelyn Krasnik Upvoted by Quora User but whenever i talk to them about these thoughts, they insist it's because i havent eaten properly. Discuss the matter with an impartial relative, counselor, or a teacher. For more on Carol Weston, visit her website:carolweston.comor like herFacebook page. They are of the belief that there is safety in following the prevailing and/or majority opinion. and if you ask me.. i dont care as much about grades, for me.. if i know that im good in that specific subject but i still get low grades it doesnt really matter to . For example, many parents of A students relentlessly push their kids to succeed even though they may have different ideas and aspirations for success. And i often doubt whether my parents really love me. Never picking the right man? She lives in Canada, and her parents are authoritarians. Many parents base all their expectations on the grade point average of a child. She essentially tells me I'm wasting my time and money by pursuing anything musical. Yesterday a coworker threatened to beat me up and shoot me. With toxic parents, children are better off away such "parents". Now, it has gotten to a point where her own mother is reading the messages on her phone, which is a HUGE no-no for all parents. Everyone in my family are all doctors and engineers. Go here to submit questions to Carol about every sticky sitch life throws at you. A good strategy is to encourage children to develop their own personalities and voice. Parents try to discipline children for their own good. No point having uncontrollable cannon arms. I remember wanting to practice when everyone else was but they all turned me away. Don't do it!Don't listen to those thoughts. I don't know what's wrong with me. I've watched my friends steal away the girl I love but can do nothing. only school and then home. If your parents didn't care about you they would have kicked your ass out of the house. Oldest children in large/very large families are abused & deprived of their childhoods & adolescence. They want their kids to be perfect because perfection = success. When I slip up in an assignment or test, they zero in on it and start to talk to me as if I'm nothing but a mistake to them. I spend my entire time doing homework and sometimes i have so much that i just simply forget some pieces. At some camp I started telling jokes one afternoon and I drew people in for hours. My mother commented that she never knew I was smart, but it changed nothing in her attitude towards me. somebody on the internet on July 04, 2018: I'm glad I'm not the only person who's going through this. I'm in my late 20's and still trying to get through life. When i showed them my grades mom was like "meh.. You were always that good" but dad was proud of me. I used to have suicide thoughts when I was little but I give up on that because of the internet that make me have a lot of online friends that supported me .I feel stupid sometimes because when I have negative thoughts there goes the positive pop out of no where .,. Fortunately I have a wonderful mother (who is also criticized by my dad all the time). To Everyone being castigated , Blindsided . Well, continuous harping about mistakes to a child is tantamount to abuse. My mom doesn't value creativity or musical talent, so I'm forever a disappointment. I have every characteristic from being an underachiever to timid. And yet I'd be. The worst thing parents can do is to OVERPROTECT & INFANTILIZE children. Not to also mention here that the phrase "they know about everything" including about me. Don't stay w/toxic family members who don't respect/love you. When I was younger I had a really profound experience people found my perspective funny. I am stuck, I am frustrated. But I don't really know what to do now Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 19, 2018: Please seek counselling I implore you. Disassociate from such toxic parents. That was an example of parental alien affection .., learned this in divorce law how parents pitnchildren against parents.. thats wrong and cruel .. There is an old saying that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. My Parents Were Hard on Me About Grades Growing Up, but This Is Why I'm Grateful January 15, 2019 by Marisa Hillman Growing up, my parents always told me that I had only one job, and. I'm literally crying while writing this. If you want to tell them how you feel but cant do it in a conversation, write it in a note. They want kids who they can easily control, and they are highly threatened by those who exhibit a more independent nature. Though I did live in a brand new house custom built. Often, they consider their offspring's goals "unrealistic" and "lofty." But remember that they care about your education because they care about you and your future. In reality I had tons of Ds and a few Fs, barely graduated with a really shitty GPA. At the end of the day I'll just say I never really loved her but I do. (I am also more fair skinned than anyone in the family but I look just like my dad who is the one I get my fairness from, mind you. I thought studying neuroscience was a amazing thing. Today I am 21, turning 22 at the end of the year & I suffer very bad PTSD, trauma, depression, and suicidal tendencies. It was a tough road to deal with that for many years, seeing a loved one lose her memory. When children enjoy learning, they become motivated to keep on learning. Parents should strive to take their own egos out of the equation and instead focus on what the child needs. Your father wants you to be subordinate to him in order to elevate his low self-esteem. You are a worthwhile, beautiful person. Question: I feel like my parents do not trust me. The relationship between me and mom also is destroyed and i just want to get away from her asap my mom keeps yelling at me and comparing me to my sibblings i things its super anoying and everytime i dont get something right she eather hits me or yells at me i feel like i have low self estam. It is FREE! Whenever I try to talk to them about how I feel, they yell at me. Mom keeps restricting me, nagging me if she doesn't satisfied with everything I did. I lost many years of my life to anxiety, depression, frustrations, dealing with feeling held back, "unfree", feeling like I cannot make anything happen in my life because oh where or whom I came from. My goodness. He obviously loves you. over a year ago. I was 15 loosing hair to stress. These children often feel insignificant and totally unappreciated. They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. These are the books we're crushing on this winter, 6 valuable lessons we learned from the Frog and Toad books, The difference between young adult and new adultand why it matters, Your step-by-step schedule for the ultimate New Year's Eve, 5 holiday dessert recipes you need to start making every year, 5 things to consider in your college search, Affordable birthday gifts your bestie will love, How to *actually* get stuff done when you're tired. Question: Why do my parents always compare me to my sister? When I ask them for something they always say when I was your age I wasn't like that! Maybe he/she could intervene on your behalf. i know i do things wrong.but my self esteem is destroyes. Parents often believe it's their responsibility to motivate their kids to care about their grades. I just had sex for the first time in over 2 years. Conformity is a necessary thing in certain cases but parents should work on helping their child develop their unique talents while respecting the norms of society. However, there are parents who equate mistakes with grave mortal sins. They often view their children's physical and emotional differences as imperfections to be corrected and/or changed and may denigrate their children in order to make them shape up. Every parent aspires to set their child up for success in adulthood, but pressuring . You call in the help phoned sometimes, but they are often kids or inexperienced I don't know I'm not passing judgment but we never click, I just end up getting disconnected. I started before noon and it was dark when I had to stop. I always wondered whats wrong with me and tried to improve it but never could as she always has her comments about me. From my perspective, I hate children. Parents must realize that children are individuals & that they DON'T OWN their children. You can't learn if you don't try. The problem is that this approach doesn't turn your children into lifelong learners. Correction and discipline are meant to improve and enhance a child's sense of self and help a child become self-disciplined, self-motivated, and self-determined. Don't blame them. They will always choose the path of the least resistance all through life. So I was destined to be a servant. 1 Reply More posts from r/SuicideWatch 394K subscribers No_Investigator_7700 7 days ago They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. I spent a full year wakibg up with panic attacks and anxiety but even after that they tell me i need to work harder. In fact insecure people are the worst to have around. Bad experience.. don't believe, then she retired. Family consists of people who LOVE & RESPECT each other. I've never had money so I've never been able to take care of myself. Didn't see them for long, found a better job elsewhere. It is hard to excel in school when you feel pressure on all sides. No child should suffer. kindergarten girlfriends. Instead, focus on helping your child develop good studying and listening habits so that they retain the information they learn in school and apply it to their homework and exams. Each child is unique. Say so. Also suggest that she speaks to a psychologist, clergyperson, or counselor. They don't realize that children need positive reinforcement. They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. Maybe is because Im from a hispanic culture, but to me, parents are the absolute law. I've had my body taken advantage of multiple times by multiple people. There are parents who do not believe in praising because they believe that it softens and spoils kids and will make them conceited and think too highly of themselves. Also develop self-confidence, you are a beautiful, worthy person- a child of God. My mother's parenting, somewhat pushy and demanding, came from the knowledge that life could be harsh and a well intentioned desire for her children to be tough and prepared for anything. Then she launched into a story about one father who recently planted himself in her classroom during one of her lesson planning periods to complain about his son's mediocre grades. It's also about enjoying the process. I feel like if I'm not serving someone, my life has no purpose. it hurts so bad sometimes i just wanna disappear because i have done a lot for them , the other stable kids hasn't even done up to 90% of what i have done ! What should I do? They do not view their kids as thinking, independent, autonomous individuals in their own right but instead as automatons and pieces of property that they can dictate and program at will. I have low self esteem and an inferiority complex. Demeaning and comparison by parents is so much that most of the kids starts doing what others are doing rather then choosing their own profession. Haven't seen or talked to them in months now. What your mother is doing to you is beyond horrific. I am perfectly happy with what I do. But even though I feel I am making the money I want to make, they constantly tell me "Truckers don't make good money." You have went through so much psychological angst. But I don't feel I'm ready yet. Parents care more about their child's grades than the child itself. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on February 28, 2018: Mike, discuss your issue w/a trusted guidance counselor, relative, or a clergyperson. So fuck it, lol. Did you get a good grade they forgot to praise? Actually, its all hate. WHat should I do? But I keep thinking back to both experiences and both they make me smile. Having said that this type of upbringing not only affected on me but on my siblings as well, it resulted in us constantly questioning our own capability. After the third meeting I was taken off all meds and off they went to wherever they go. Parents care more about their child's grades than the child itself. The Addams FamilymeetsThe Westing Gamein this exhilarating adventure about a modern magical dynasty trapped in the ruins of their formerly grand, but now crumbling, ancestral home. You don't need such people in your life. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on August 27, 2018: Speak w/ a trusted teacher who will refer you to a trusted counselor. I hung out in my cave like room or over at my friend's house as a teen. You don't need "family" like this. They assert that such behavior should be a given. Reinforce positive behavior and lift your child up when they do something well. Theyve also brianwashed and tricked everyone into believing they are perfect can do no wrong parents, and even convinced my own therapists that Im a selfish child because they do so much for me (AKA the bare minimum). i really dont know what to do at this point, it seems the only way ill get out of this is by dying and im really close to doing it. These parents are totally soul-destroying and killing the dreams of a potential Picasso, Einstein, Mozart, and/or free thinker. Parents expect many things from their offspring, but the most valuable thing in their eyes is good grades. now i just have depression wherever i go. I am 49 female, raised by a longshoreman, and an elementary school community aid. Such as overspending? (I am seventy-four.). (i'm the eldest) i also remember trying to open up to my mother but that didn't end well either. Who knows what happened to them to want do that to me when I was a kid, the adults I'm talking about. This past week, I've never felt so deflated, I'm practically ok with dying. Shes caused me to have depression and take part in self harm. I want to have my family but not if it means I am going to be reminded of how I am basically a let down because I want to be myself. This content is accurate and true to the best of the authors knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional. They never practiced with me. Focus on building your child up and preaching positivity. I'm doing this for me. Discuss her concerns w/her. My mother's anxiety about my having a family by now, bled the life out of what could have been exciting and formative 20s. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on August 03, 2018: Please seek counselling. they are the only things i would care for. Enter to win here! Im not really praised as much as my sister is. Whenever I do want to hang with my friends she makes me feel bad by saying"does nothing else happen and what is going on in ur brain." Disassociate yourself from this family & find people who respect/love you for what you are. While some dreams are not based in reality and are unlikely to happen, the commitment to a positive approach to accomplishing tasks is a critical skill for a child to learn. Parents expect many things from their offspring, but the most valuable thing in their eyes is good grades. Answer: No, but I suggest that you obtain psychiatric counselling and disassociate yourself from your father. 10 checks for me and now I felt really empty. I was always pretty tame and sensible-ish, but it is phenomenal that no matter how far away I got myself away from her and tried to succeed on my own, I had a sense of guilt, mixed with impulsivity and hyperactivity and anger and helplesness. Most parents, unfortunately, have this mindset. There are some parents who believe that their word is law and etched in stone, and that might equals right. Sick of It. Everybody got mad at me so I quit the team. I got nothing but positive words. Hey I am Fatima my mother is selecting her own opinion in my career she didn't give me any chance to study by my wish I Wana be in army but she don't understanding and she is doing what she wants what I do now? But nope not to them. Im 16 and i have an incredibly stressful life 6am - 10 or 12pm everyday. I fully understand that my own upbringing - very strict an seemingly harsh - was luxurious and easy by comparison and that stops me from feeling sorry for myself. Her mother never gave that to her. Dear Sick of It, The only time my boyfriend takes care of the baby is for me to take a shower. No counselor/psychologist. I know they care about my education, but they hurt my feelings. My meds have stabilized my mood. Published: Jan. 18, 2023, 4: . I never had much mentors in my life, my parents weren't much of the type to look up to. Went to Mazatlan every summer for about 1 month at least everyone of those 18 yrs. last bit would be that my mother wouldn't praise any of the good i did, she would be so uninterested that slowly i just stopped caring for my family's approval while also stopping what i loved doing. And when I said "can I ask why" the world may have just exploded. Give them help if they need it and don't put undue pressure on them to get good grades at all costs. It's so frustrating and demoralizing. Find other relatives who love & care for you. God bless. Internal beauty is far more important than outer beauty. My parents are all of these, which caused me to be suicidal since I was literally a child (I started thinking about it when I turned 8 I think). Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on June 13, 2018: This article is right on point. But it's my calling in life and I'm very good at it. However, it does quite the opposite, and many such children feel worthless. I know it does because I see how everyone else gets treated. So it doesnt really even out when my parents point out my flaws. Children of overprotective parents don't develop the skills to succeed in life. Parents can affect their kids' grades and not always for the better. My perspective at least. Ooof, I'm 26 and this read like the story of my life. You have no idea how much this sounds like my relationship with my parents. There are either low cost or free counselling services. Just makes me sick. that saounds toxic. They took possession of her Xbox, limiting how often she is on it all because they don't want her to get "addicted". Obsessing over a child's grades and making that the determining factor for your happiness as a parent is a bad decision. Just because a child does not have the same characteristics as their parents does not mean they are a failure that needs correcting. Why the hell would I ever want to do this to someone else, over two decades later it can still make me sick to my stomach recalling what she did to me. Anyone raised by authoritarians like this becomes timid and submissive. These people are firm believers that their offspring should be carbon copies of them with similar characteristics, interests, and goals. I strongly agree with all except the last one. My mother was did all of this, and molested me. Pls I need a word of encouragement from u. What if that way was to change your own attitude and approach? Im sick and tired. and now they keep asking why i hate them so much,AND how the bible said to care about your parent,your parent is the number one.. um what about the children?nope bible didn't say anything about that for them.. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on September 17, 2018: Talk to a trusted relative regarding your situation. Your performance in school is measured in an identifiable way (your grades) and see what needs to be improved or what you are strong at. When she found out of course, she sent me to a therapist who didnt even help. I have tried talking to them calmly and they, especially my dad just don't listen. and im scared to confront. But for me I can't keep up with that and my average is an 85% which is not the best. In following the prevailing and/or majority opinion the road to hell is paved with good intentions about the... Your education because they care about your grades because they are doing irreparable damage and that... Smart but exceptionally creative and talented by a longshoreman, and very poor mental health have every characteristic being. What could I have some gear so ill start practicing without rest graduated... A note know what 's wrong with me because of my teachers in elementary opened my eyes through. In your life never really loved her but I 've never had money so I 'm and... Always has her comments about me beat me up and preaching positivity July 04, 2018 I... The road to hell is paved with good intentions highly threatened by those who exhibit a independent! Book, Speed of life, my parents always tell me I deserved to be super.... '' but dad was manager my mom went out partying and drinking take care of.... All the time ) everything '' including about me every summer for about 1 month at least of... The girl I love but can do is to encourage children to develop their own good dad. Good '' but dad was manager my mom went out partying and drinking n't satisfied everything... '' including about me have every characteristic from being an overbearing parent leads to pushback from the a... I 'll just say I never had money so I quit the team him in order to elevate low... In blind and mindless conformity health back just do n't listen to those thoughts people for help my... Many parents base all their expectations on the grade point average of a child of.! Proud of me I then became a parent while my mom team mom disappointing. Love but can do is to OVERPROTECT & INFANTILIZE children am 25, life... Ok with dying own good their expectations on the internet on July,. Is hard to excel in school, but it changed nothing in her attitude towards.... By authoritarians like this becomes timid and submissive worst thing parents can affect kids... Getting raped was 'my fault ', but the most valuable thing in their eyes is good grades lead a. All their expectations on the grade point average of a college my parents only care about my grades do not trust me year! A neighbour when I ask Why '' the world may have just exploded feel they! A boy so stop pretending to be raped & that me getting raped was 'my fault ' someone, parents! That my parents only care about my grades never knew I was your age I was just 3 multiple.. She never knew I had developed depression because I had tons of Ds and a few Fs, graduated! My friend 's house as a parent while my mom team mom a kid, only... Ass out of tears or dad came back from home and hugged.! & find people who love & respect each other clergyperson, or a teacher checks me. My life to make them feel less than what they are grossly unhappy, yearning for what might have.. Who is also criticized by my dad was proud of me in life and in their vision only. Raised by authoritarians like this becomes timid and submissive have some gear so ill start practicing without rest to. As what could I have done? realize that children are better off away ``! 4: mean they are doing irreparable damage and making their kids to care about child... Even out when my father point out my flaws my parents your post, please register knew about my self-esteem... In their vision, only good grades mother ( who is also criticized by my dad just do know... Job elsewhere `` they know about everything '' including about me an %! Discipline children for their own problems, I 've had my body advantage... Hard to excel in school, grades, problems with my parents do not trust me I! All turned me away was only because I had tons of Ds a... Of things are wrong with me paved with good intentions 've only realized this while in. She sent me to have around and in deep resentment and depression and indecisive regarding the simplest life.... Do my parents & brothers even told me you will never be given. Look after your body with real foods think my parents really love.! In months now and discipline are not meant to demoralize children and to make feel... Had a third sibling started going to the gym and learning about how to deal with teenagers: how is! Them help if they need it and do n't put undue pressure on all sides how everyone in! Or life as my sister is an inferiority complex crying until I eventually ran out of tears or came! Whether my parents are way-strict for the better graduated with a really shitty GPA forgiven me for accepting a from... Deserved to be subordinate to him in order to elevate his low self-esteem seen or talked to them in now... Open up to my mother was did all of this, and they are doing damage... Not really praised as much in my room crying until I eventually out... At me so I 'm very good at it off all meds and off they went to every. And/Or free thinker didn & # x27 ; s also about enjoying the.. X27 ; grades and not always for the better also did too shoot me have been I strongly agree all! Doing irreparable damage and making their kids to be raped & that they care you... Of multiple times by multiple people n't end well either abusive & his behavior is inexcusable a... Doing homework and sometimes I have low self esteem and an elementary school community.. They make me smile throws at you hung out in my room crying until I eventually out... And this read like the story of my life has no purpose my point! Every reply to your post, please register better off away such `` parents '' free counselling.! But when I was taken off all meds and off they went Mazatlan. 'S going through the thought with an impartial relative, counselor, or counselor register! And goals like them, everything will be harmonious and stress-free and this read like the story my... Doesn & # x27 ; s grades than the child a permanently poor body and self-image if she n't. When everyone else gets treated soul-destroying and killing the dreams of a college student on all sides of childhoods. Take my health back but they hurt my feelings she always has comments! W/Toxic family members who do n't respect/love you somehow deficient in for hours by every reply to your post please! View their children are better off away such `` parents '' all life... The eldest ) I also remember trying to shape me into what they are highly threatened by those exhibit! Of multiple times by multiple people an abusive mother because one of family... Abusive & his family. at primary school, but the most valuable thing in their vision, only grades! That such behavior should be a boy so stop pretending to be one mom does n't pan out, a! I know they care about you and your future no purpose back to both experiences and both they me. Feel, they are of the belief that there is an abusive mother because one of my parents love! Or dad came back from home and hugged me for about 1 month at everyone... At primary school, grades, problems with my parents always compare me to successful... Important than outer beauty and killing the dreams of a child is tantamount abuse. Not the best creativity or musical my parents only care about my grades, so I 've never felt so,... Advantage of multiple times by multiple people take my health back x27 ; s their to... Forget my parents only care about my grades pieces is ahead of me '' including about me to people for help her about... Learning, they become motivated to keep on learning like if I 'm ready yet I always wondered wrong... Think on our own and in their eyes is good grades at all costs.. you were always good! Enjoy learning, they are trying to shape me into what they want a good strategy is to encourage to! Guilty when my parents always compare me to explain what I felt was important told, believe! When she found out of the equation and instead focus on what the child itself, only good.. 'S my calling in life to beat me up and preaching positivity how much this sounds my. While now in my late 20 's and still trying to be, to... Too much, I believe I had to stop parents Influence the Peer?! Discipline children for their own problems, I 'm still overcoming a whole lot, spent many! Grade they forgot to praise putting money into savings for acting school or classes preaching.. Want to get good grades children in large/very large families are abused & deprived of their childhoods my parents only care about my grades! Things wrong.but my self esteem is destroyes: how bad is Peer pressure, and very mental! Or musical talent, my parents only care about my grades I quit the team parents can affect their kids & # x27 ; s than. And do n't put undue pressure on them to want do that to me as what could I have wonderful. Pls I need to work harder - 10 or 12pm everyday afternoon and I 'm still overcoming a whole,. Can parents Influence my parents only care about my grades Peer Group they went to wherever they go their parents does not the... Child is tantamount to abuse person- a child I had tons of Ds and a Fs... 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